How To Survive A Long-Distance Relationship

As someone who was previously in a long-term long-distance relationship, I figured I should pass on some of my wisdom about them to people who might be facing one now.

So, here are my tips for surviving a long-distance relationship!

  1. Trust each other. Even if you wholeheartedly trust your partner, long-distance relationships can create moments of doubt. In successful long-distance relationships, you have to have a level of trust and loyalty that goes above all else that is thrown at you.
  2. Take the extra time you have and devote it to yourself. Go do the things that you’ve always wanted to do, develop your hobbies, or spend time with your friends. Just because your significant other isn’t there, doesn’t mean that you have to stop living a fun life. Plus, keeping busy will keep you from obsessively missing them.
  3. Communicate. Make time so that you can both sit down to a weekly Skype or Facetime call to really catch up with one another and hear each other’s voice. Texting and apps like WhatsApp are great for keeping in touch while you’re apart from each other as well.
  4. Have an end date in mind to being apart, so you know where you’re headed long term with your significant other. Or, if you can’t plan a definitive end date, plan a date for when you’ll see or visit each other next.
  5. Send them a gift from time to time. It could be for a special event or just because, but it’s always a sweet thing to do to let them know you’re thinking of them.
  6. Work through the rough patches together. Long-distance relationships aren’t problem free, so having open lines of communication to solve and discuss problems is vital to success in the long run. However, remember that if you’re arguing with your significant other, that sometimes you’ll need to give them space.
  7. Remember that your significant other has a life too. You can’t expect them to be there 24/7, but they should at least be there for when it matters. Especially if they’re working or in university, cut your partner some slack if they’re really busy.
  8. Don’t give into jealousy. It may be easy to envy the relationships of your friends or family, but it won’t improve your long-distance relationship. Remember, you can’t judge the success of your long-distance relationship by the standards of relationships around you.
  9. Don’t cheat on your partner. It is incredibly unfair to the other person, especially if they trust you completely. However, if you do, please let your partner know as soon as possible, since then you can decide whether to carry on the relationship or not.
  10. Make sure you and your partner are on the same page. If you sit down as a couple now and then to discuss and reassess where your relationship is going, it will help you grow together and overcome any problems. As well, if you decide that both of you have changed and want to go down separate paths, it might save you some heartache.
  11. Last but not least, enjoy your time in your long-distance relationship. While they are a challenge and are hard to maintain, there may be a time when you look back on the relationship fondly. And who knows, maybe your long-distance will end because you’ve moved in with the love of your life.

I hope that my advice helped those of you that are in long-distance relationships or about to be in one. If you have any long-distance relationship tips as well, feel free to drop them in the comments!

-Mel.

 

A Thank You To X

Dear X,

Thank you for the last three years together, through all the ups and downs of our relationship.

Thank you for being my first at almost everything in my love life. First date, first boyfriend, first long-distance relationship, first dance partner, and first plus one.

Thank you for always being there, even if it was the middle of the night.

Thank you for letting me show you my soul and not judging me for it.

Thank you for showing me that love does exist after witnessing my parent’s divorce.

Thank you for not making this more painful and messy than it should be; and still letting me be a great but smaller part of your life.

Thank you for giving me hope and the confidence in myself when I needed it the most in my life.

Most importantly, thank you for being you.

Love always,

Mel.