Day 23: Your Definition of Love

Love, to me at least, is a concept that doesn’t have one particular definition, since there are many types of love and many qualities of (good) love.

However, if I had to, I would define love as an emotional and/or physical bond between individuals. This includes bonds between family, friends, and significant others.

I believe that love has certain qualities that distinguishes it from other things. Love brings people together in the best and worst of times in life, but it also has the power to cause great harm. If you can truly expect someone to in your life no matter what, then that embodies an element of love.

Love also involves elements of respect and trust for me. Those who love you should respect your opinions and what you do with your life, but in a way that is constructive to make you a better person. They should also be loyal, and not willing to disclose all your secrets or cheat on you on a whim.

Anyways, I could write an essay about what love is and is not, so I’ll stop here before I start philosophizing all day. If you’d like to see more of my thoughts about love, you can always check out my writing posts under the love category.

Do you agree with my definition of love? Leave me a comment below with your thoughts!

-Mel.

 

Day 3: Five ways to win your heart

Well, if any of you are wondering how to sweep me off my feet, then here you go! These are five of the things that can guarantee you’ll at least win a bit of my heart…

  1. Be kind. Kindness is rare these days, so showing that you care about others goes a long way. This especially applies when on a date, since I will judge people by how well they treat waitresses, cashiers, etc.
  2. Be honest and open. I really appreciate when people are forthcoming with what they want out of a potential relationship, especially when it comes to the game called online dating. In general, being open and honest about your opinions and your expectations will help in the long run as well.
  3. Respect that I am a person. Just like everyone else, I have goals, opinions, and preferences. There’s nothing more annoying than having someone diss everything you like or questioning whether every single decision you make is acceptable. I may make mistakes, but respecting that I am an individual that is fully capable of saying no or deciding my career path is more than appreciated.
  4. Taking care of the small things. I’m the type of person who already has a life plan and long-term goals that I’m working towards. So, I appreciate when others take care of some of the smaller things, like doing the dishes or grabbing that one thing I forgot doing groceries. It’s also super nice to have someone check in with a simple “how are you?” every now and then.
  5. Don’t go over the top. While those grand romantic gestures are great for the movies, they don’t work so well in real life. Honestly, I’d rather spend a few hours chatting in a coffee shop or going for a wander than getting my own horse-drawn carriage. After all, the simple things in life are really what matter.

Does my list match some of the ways people can win your hearts? Drop me a comment below!

-Mel.

Finding Your Voice

I’ve had a blog or journal since I was in elementary school. So, I can say I’ve always had some way to express my own voice, and only recently has it been made more public by things like this blog.

But I haven’t always had the same voice. I doubt I would have even expressed my views on politics and current events a few years ago, but now I’ve started to.

I think part of that is because I’ve realized that the more silent you stay, the more other people take your decisions for you. And that thought terrifies me as someone who values equality between sexes and the liberty to choose who I date, among other things.

So, I have decided of late to use my voice more for expressing what I value, and for those who may not have as much access to express what they value. However, that includes acknowledging the fact that I cannot speak on behalf of groups that have experienced life in another way that I have never been subjected to. Instead, I’m choosing to be an ally to those groups and help support them in the causes that are important to their them.

Not to mention, I think now more than ever the world needs to recognize we are all humans and all deserve to be treated with respect. This is not a time to tear each other down for being different, but a time to embrace those differences to work together for a better future.

So, I hope you all find your voice and use it for the good of humanity.

Peace and love,

Mel.

Day 21-Turn on and offs

I’ve gathered my top three turn ons and offs dating wise mostly, but they’re applicable to friendships as well!

Turn-ons:

  1. Sense of humour: If you can make me laugh, you’re doing well. Also, if you understand my sarcastic sense of humour, you are automatically my best friend.
  2. Intelligence: By intelligence, I don’t mean you have to love everything I like to learn about. I find it really nice to be able to hold an intelligent conversation, and if you can bring something for me to learn about, kudos to you.
  3. Loyalty: As weird as this may sound, but if you aren’t loyal to me, or to those in your life, I probably won’t date you. Loyalty for me is one of the things I give wholeheartedly to a relationship, and if the other person can’t, game over.

Turn-offs:

  1. Not answering messages: I understand life is busy, that everyone has things they have to do. But if you can’t take five minutes out of your day to send a quick response, why should I take five minutes of my time to talk to you?
  2. Not being kind: What I mean by this is a level of kindness for everyone. You may not like everyone, and I get that, but yelling at waitresses and those in retail won’t get you brownie points. For me, this is also tied to having a level of respect for everyone.
  3. Treating me like an object: Ladies, and men to some degree, you know what I mean. I’m sorry guys, but if you treat me like an object that will fulfill all your desires, better start running, because I don’t tolerate that at all. I am a PERSON, and deserve to be treated as such.

There you go, short but sweet list of my turn-ons and turn-offs. What are yours? Comment them below!

-Mel.